Think Positive Positively!

Er, what?!

If you think a negative thought and then you try and get shot of it or try to not think about it, ultimately you’ll end up thinking more about that negative thought; you’ll be thinking positively negatively.

Thinking is very much like breathing; it goes on all the time, day or night, and you can’t stop it. What you can do though is change it, much like you can change the way you breathe – breathing slowly, deeply etc.

At the end of the day you could say something depressing or upsetting to yourself or you could say something inspiring or uplifting to yourself; you can’t stop thinking entirely though. If you finding yourself disliking what you’re thinking about, instead of trying to stop thinking those thoughts, try to direct your mind to other thoughts.

Is that all I hear you say? The easiest way to direct your thoughts is by asking yourself a question. Doing this gets your mind going in a new direction without trying to supress what you were originally thinking about.

Now, the kind of question you ask yourself makes a huge amount of difference. If you ask yourself something like “why is this happening to poor, sorry old me?” the resulting answers won’t help you at all. Far too negative. The idea is to try and direct your mind by asking questions that make you think about practical things, the future and the like.

If you find yourself worrying about something then ask yourself something like “how can I be stronger and better equipped to deal with this?” or even something as simple as “what is my goal?”; they direct you to look at something positive.

If you find yourself thinking negatively about something bad that happened, ask yourself “what’s good about this situation?” or “how can I turn this to my advantage?”; ask a good question.

Once you’ve decided on the question to ask yourself, ask the question and keep on asking it. Let it run through your mind when ever you can as it will turn the tide of your thoughts and change your state of mind because you’ll be thinking positively positively.

So what makes a good question?

When something goes wrong the question that naturally comes to mind is “why?”. Unfortunately that’s a question fraught with danger. Self-blame or victim hood is a frequent side effect of this question as we will always attempt to answer this question with what ever knowledge we have at that time and try to come up with a plausible answer, however wrong it may be! The problem with a “why” question is you get too many answers you inevitably can’t do anything about.

Answers to “why” questions can be intriguing, entertaining even, but if you want to handle a situation well and get on with living again, ask “how” not “why” as it’s far more efficient.

As your mind will always try to answer any question you may put to it, the kind of questions you are make a very big difference. Ask yourself what you really want to know: “how can I avoid this in the future?” or “how can I make things better?”. The answers to these sorts of questions will be much more productive for you, avoiding getting sidestracked into what can become an endless search for “understanding”, whereas “how” questions lead to actions and it’s these actions that solve problems and bring about real change.